Short Writing 3: My July

  بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمٰنِ الرَّحِيْمِ 

In the name of Allah, the most Gracious, the most Merciful

There are things in life that we can’t complain for. Allah knows best for me and you.

I May feel pain, I may get hurt, but all those feelings somehow will lead you back to your Creator, to the best version of yourself.

I may don’t know what He already planned for me, but I know for sure, He wants best for me. He wants to save me.

I admit that I am not good enough. I ignored His signs. His signs that I should stop doing wrong. But He never give up to give me that signs. I might be late to realize His signs, but I thank Allah that He never closed His door for me. I cried a lot, I depressed, but in the end He is The One who waits for me and actually He always been there for me, in all the situations i got thru. 

O Allah, what will I be if you are not taking care of me. I might get lost and fell into an endless sorrow. It’s really hard for me at first to Trust You back, I know it’s not good, actually I trust You, but syaithan kept telling me that You won’t help me. And I am thankful that I have a friend that reminds me of You, She suddenly texted me, and i was explaining my problems to her, and in the end, she kept telling me that if I believe in You to solve my problem, then He definitely will. Because Allah is as His slave thinks of Him. I know this theory well, but since I realized my sins are much, then it makes me think Allah won’t be care to me anymore. But I am wrong. He shows me His love by sending my friend to checked up on me, to ask me what’s wrong and she gave me advices and conviction to be back to You again, to Trust You again. O Allah, what which is it the favors of My Lord that I deny? :(

Hopefully, I can be fully healed,

Hopefully, I will never create previous mistakes anymore

Hopefully, Allah will soon give me what I desire

Hopefully, I can be the best version of myself

Hopefully, I always be grateful for what You give to me..

Aamiin ..